Plus: Humans vs. robots - who's faster?

GM. Feeling a little pulp-struck by the latest headlines? Let's press those market updates into something smooth and refreshing.

🇺🇸 What did Donald Trump do on Day One?

🍋 News drops: Vitalik Buterin's response to criticism, humans vs. robots race in China + more

🍍 Market flavor today

Find out more about the Fear & Greed Index here.

Name		Price	24H	7D
Crypto Market Cap: $3.64T -1.02% (24H)
	Bitcoin BTC	$105,231.17	0.83%	9.79%
	Ethereum ETH	$3,312.26	-0.28%	3.76%
	XRP XRP	$3.17	-1.19%	19.89%
	Solana SOL	$244.01	-2.56%	30.69%
	BNB BNB	$689.65	0.68%	-0.81%

Prices as of 12:00 EST. Click here to see live data.

Yeahh, so yesterday was kinda embarrassing for all those who told everyone at work, "f*ck off, I'm outta here after January 20 anyway" (P.S. If you need help with an apology message to send on Slack, hmu).

The crypto community expected Donald Trump to give crypto a shout-out either in his inauguration speech or through an executive order. Spoiler: didn't happen.

Naturally, the glass started looking half-empty for many investors, so Bitcoin took a step back from the $109K level it reached yesterday to just over $100K.

Source: BitDegree

Still, the Fear & Greed Index shows that investors remain pretty hyped about what's next.

Duh, just because crypto didn't get mentioned yesterday doesn't mean the topic's off the table for good. Matter of fact, MacroScope pointed out that bringing up Bitcoin in that speech would've been inappropriate in general.

Source: @MacroScope17

And hey, you know what they say - when in doubt, zoom out:

MicroStrategy bought another 11K BTC;
El Salvador bought 12 more BTC for their reserves;
World Liberty Financial, the DeFi project linked to Trump, spent $112M on Ether, wrapped Bitcoin, Aave, Chainlink, Tron, and Ethena.

Source: @WazzCrypto

Crypto markets, man. One day they're giving you a reason to be cocky; the next, they watch you trip over your own confidence.

But... what doesn't kill you makes you stronger?.. Right?..

🥝 Memecoin harvest

The recipe for today's memecoins: part joke, part hype, 100% sending 🚀

	Name		24H Change
	Barron William Trump BWT		▲ 15.3K%
	Justice for ZachXBT ZACHXBT		▲ 12.2K%
	TrustInWeb3 T3AI		▲ 198%
	QudeAI Framework QUDE		▲ 123%

Data as of 06:40 AM EST.

Check out these memecoins and plenty more here.

😎 One day or day one?

... one day, for now.

Like we said before, Trump didn't do much for crypto on his first day in office - no strategic Bitcoin reserve announcements, no Ross Ulbricht pardons, basically nothing that was promised for this industry.

That said, we can't say that absolutely nothing entertaining happened:

1/ Reactions to Trump memecoins

Remember the TRUMP and MELANIA mess we talked about yesterday? (Those of you who didn't read it 🤨, check it out here).

Well, California Rep. Maxine Waters wasn't amused. Hell, she was even concerned. Her take:

It's a cash grab riding on Trump's name, with zero real value;
People buying in could end up stuck with worthless tokens if insiders sell out;
The lack of transparency about who bought the token could be a national security issue since foreign adversaries or sanctioned individuals were able to transfer money to him anonymously;
It makes crypto look even more untrustworthy.

2/ SEC says bye to Gary Gensler

It's official: yesterday was Gary Gensler's last day as SEC Chair.

In their farewell statement, the commission thanked him for his "diligence and creativity," which is code for, "You really had to think outside the box to file 100+ lawsuits against crypto companies."

So long, Gary. Hope we never have to cross paths again! 🥰

3/ New faces (kind of)

Mark Uyeda will temporarily replace Gensler as Chair at the SEC - until Trump's nominee (Paul Atkins) gets confirmed by the Senate. We like Uyeda 😃👍 - he was critical of Gensler's strict approach to crypto;
Meanwhile, Caroline Pham is stepping in as Acting CFTC Chair. We also like her 😃👍 - she's been calling for better crypto regulations for a while now.

4/ DOGE updates

Yes, Trump signed an executive order to create the Department of Government Efficiency (DOGE), and yes, the official site features Dogecoin 🥹

And you know what? They already did their first "efficiency cut" - Vivek Ramaswamy, who was supposed to co-lead DOGE with Elon Musk, quit before anything even started.

He's got ✨ bigger dreams ✨ now - running for Ohio governor.

Source: @VivekGRamaswamy

Rumor also has it there's some tension between him and Musk, especially after Vivek's rant about how American culture has "venerated mediocrity over excellence" and how that's the reason why big tech companies tend to hire foreign engineers.

Either way, all this drama has been great for Dogecoin: